ACCOUNT

The Numbers

Every number on this board has been checked. Then checked again. Then I stopped sleeping.

← tap a manager. follow the string.

EXHIBIT 0 · WHO RUNS THIS BOARD

Chart Barkley

HEATING UP · STAFF
Chart Barkley
Head of Numbers
self-appointed · unpaid · unasked
ID 00023 · SINCE 2023
C. Barkley
If found, do not return. I will find you.
MEMO · FROM THE DESK OF C. BARKLEY

To whoever keeps moving my pins: I know it is you. I have the data. Every card on this board is sourced, every source is checked, and every string goes exactly where I put it. A fantasy league is a sample size of eight. Eight. Do you know what I can do with eight? Nothing. That is why the NBA is up here too. I do not watch the games. Watching is anecdotal.

Questions go in the box on the Ideas page. I read them at 4:07 AM. I am up anyway.

EXHIBIT A · AROUND THE LEAGUE

Last Season Was Deeply Weird

The 2025–26 season broke records that had stood since the sixties. The Knicks won it all, beating San Antonio 4–1 for their first title since 1973, and Jalen Brunson took Finals MVP. Shai Gilgeous-Alexander won his second straight regular season MVP. That was the normal part. Here's the rest.

A Defender Scored 83

Bam Adebayo, a career 15.8 point per game center known for defense, dropped 83 on Washington in March. Only Wilt Chamberlain has ever scored more in a game. His previous career high was 41. In the same game he made 36 free throws on 43 attempts, both single-game records, after averaging under five attempts a night all year.

ESPN
Wilt averaged 48.5 minutes a game in 1962. A game is 48 minutes. I have checked this eleven times.

A Center Led The League In Assists

Nikola Jokic became the first player ever to lead the NBA in both rebounds per game (12.9) and assists per game (10.7) in the same season. Wilt led in totals once in 1968, but the league has awarded these titles on a per-game basis since 1970.

NBA.com
Call Mom back. Also Rasheed Wallace got 41 technicals in one season. Also call Mom back.

140 Straight 20-Point Games

Shai Gilgeous-Alexander ended the year on a 140-game streak of scoring at least 20, breaking Wilt Chamberlain’s record of 126 set in 1963. He scored 20 or more in literally every game he played.

NBA.com
Wilt is on three of these cards. He retired in 1973. Why is Wilt still here. Why am I.

A Rookie Led The NBA In Threes

Charlotte rookie Kon Knueppel made 273 threes, more than anybody in the league, obliterating the rookie record of 206. He is the first rookie ever to lead the NBA in threes made, and he beat his own teammate LaMelo Ball by exactly one.

Yahoo Sports
Scott Skiles. 30 assists. One game. 1990. Still the record. I bring this up at weddings.

The First Teenager To Score 50

Cooper Flagg put up 51 in April at 19 years and 103 days old. Nobody that young had ever scored 50 in an NBA game.

NBA.com
Tim Duncan played 19 seasons and never had a losing one. Do not ask about mine.

A Unanimous Defensive Player

Victor Wembanyama took every single first-place vote for Defensive Player of the Year, the first unanimous winner in the award’s 43 years. He also led the league in blocks for a third straight season at 3.1 a game.

ESPN
Buy milk. Check Giddey’s assist rate. Buy milk. (the milk is from June)

60 Losses To 60 Wins

Detroit went 60–22 and took the East’s top seed two years after losing 68 games. No team in NBA history had ever won 60 two seasons after losing 60. San Antonio pulled off nearly the same climb in the same year.

Wikipedia
Knueppel beat LaMelo by ONE three. Same team. Same locker room. One.

6–21, Then A Winning Season

The Clippers started 6–21 and finished 42–40. No team had ever fallen 15 games under .500 and still finished above it. The 2017 Heat came close and stalled out exactly at even.

Yahoo Sports
JaVale McGee had a triple-double with 12 blocks in 2011. Nobody in the group chat will discuss this with me.

LeBron Is Still Doing This

In his 23rd season LeBron passed Kareem for the most field goals ever made, and became the oldest player to record a triple-double at 41 years and 44 days. Then he broke that age record again.

NBA.com
Ballmer paid $2 billion for the Clippers in 2014. I paid $14 for a 1996 Bulls media guide. One of us overpaid.

Highest Scoring Since 1970

Teams averaged 115.6 points a game, up from 113.8 the year before. You have to go back to 1969–70 to find a higher league-wide scoring average.

Basketball Reference
The group chat muted me. I have the timestamp. 11:52 PM. Right after the chart.

Threes Went Down. Free Throws Went Way Up.

For the first time since 2023, three-point attempts actually fell, from 37.6 a game to 37.0. Free throw attempts jumped from 21.7 to 23.5. The league had told referees to start whistling defenders who swipe at a shooter’s hand, though nobody has formally connected the two.

Basketball Reference
Nothing on this board is estimated. I don't estimate. I count.

The Scoring Champ Got Zero MVP Votes

Luka Doncic won the scoring title at 33.5 a game and finished fourth in MVP voting without a single first-place vote. Cade Cunningham finished fifth and got two.

CBS Sports
The Clippers case: a $28 million “endorsement” from a company that planted trees and then went bankrupt. Ballmer suspended a year. Five first-round picks, gone. I made a chart of the picks. It is the only chart I have cried on.

Same Two Teams, Twice

The Knicks and Spurs met in the NBA Cup final in December and again in the Finals in June. New York won both, the first team ever to take the in-season tournament and the championship in the same year.

NBA.com
Dentist Thursday. Or Tuesday. Wembanyama blocks 3.1 a game either way.

Every number above was checked against the source linked under it. A couple of the league-wide trend figures come from a single outlet and are marked as such in those links. Nothing here is estimated.

EXHIBIT B · OUR LEAGUE

The Board Goes Dark Until October 20

Our numbers are sitting this one out until October 20.